Some titles here are in limbo; I'll never finish them, but I will probably never put them in "Will Not Finish" either.
|Divergence Eve (TV)||Worst ever|
Forget the incomprehensible technobabble, the crude CGI, the uninspiring mechs, the outdated (even by 2003 standards) character designs, the limited animation, and the infamous torpedo breasts. Together those issues get the bulk of the criticism that is directed at this show, and they're all irritating to be sure. However, they aren't what makes this episode so awful.
I can tolerate - even enjoy - a mysterious and confusing first episode. That is, if it is well-made and shows promise. If it is well-directed. If it hooks me in. If I can be confident that all will be revealed, and that said reveal is logically sound and wraps up the mysteries. But on the flip side, I loathe and detest crap, and this episode is even worse than that.
So what is the fundamental flaw which kills this episode? Well, it's simply not interesting. It's painfully boring. The characters weren't fleshed out at all and I was unable to care what was happening to them. And while holding cards to the chest is standard practice for a mystery story, the first episode explained nothing at all. With no information whatsoever about what was going on, there was no reason for me to be invested in the story.
Ultimately, this was one of the worst first episodes I have ever seen. I considered watching the second to see if the show got any better, but with such a diabolical start it hasn't earned that right.
|Vampire Holmes (TV)||Awful|
Yikes this was a dire effort. The laughably amateurish animation I could tolerate, but the humour - or complete lack of it - was the real killer.
|Prism Ark (TV)||Bad|
Such a shame. The first episode was pretty good, but then the show descended into a painful high school comedy. Sigh.
|Triage X (TV)||Bad|
So bad it's actually watchable, this clunker of a show is a joke and yet the production staff aren't in on it. Most of the key roles are filled by veterans yet they've still come up with this abomination. Sure, Xebec aren't exactly known for producing quality, but surely they could have done better than this.
Your mileage may vary. See, apart from the very impressive battle, there isn't a whole lot to like here. Unless, that is, you like the show's brand of meta humour, in which case you'll be all over it. The script certainly throws enough jokes out there, but none of them landed for me, and I found the episode to be a tiresome viewing experience. That's not good.
|Kyōkai no Rinne (TV)||Weak|
Boring, painfully generic, and there's absolutely no chemistry between the leads. In this episode the girl had no other involvement in the story apart from being the dude's moneylender. I know that Rumiko Takahashi can write good starts to her stories, as seen in InuYasha and Mermaid Forest. But this comes across as phoned in, and that is a charitable assessment.
|Punch Line (TV)||Weak|
Is THIS what noitaminA has been reduced to showing? It used to be so much better than this.
|Seraph of the End: Vampire Reign (TV)||Weak|
In episode one the vampire is killed by Yu, Mika begs Yu to keep going to safety, and once Yu has gone Mika then passes out. In the episode two recap, the vampire is alive and sucks on Mika's blood whilst Yu watches, then Yu runs away. The events are fundamentally different, since the vampire being alive or not makes a huge difference to Mika's fate.
And really, this is but one example of just how flimsy the writing is. Being stoically generic is one thing, being incompetently-written and riddled with plot holes galore is quite another. I can see this becoming the next Big Thing, which is another way of saying it's a populist piece of crap. I would rather do just about anything else than watch another twenty-two episodes of this tripe. Hmm, the garden needs to be weeded before winter sets in . . .
|Food Wars! Shokugeki no Soma (TV)||Not really good|
I'll admit this ain't my cup of tea, but even so it's still a poorly-done effort. It's just a weakly animated and scored "I wanna be the best" shounen battle story, only with culinary skills instead of martial arts or sports. The only time it really deviates from the formula is when it showcases bizarrely over-the-top orgasm scenes instead of the more sedate fanservice found elsewhere. And of course there's a special school (which apes Kill la Kill of all things) that the protagonist must attend, where he'll have to prove himself to be the best in his chosen field.
Had this been a straight-up parody it might well have been fantastically enjoyable, but unfortunately it plays it too straight. Of course it still could have been alright had it implemented the formula in a smart way, but take out the food fanservice and all you're left with is generic-as-crap characters populating a generic-as-crap story.
|Nadia - The Secret of Blue Water (TV)||Not really good|
The tone is juvenile, the plot is weak, Nadia's hippy attitude is annoying, and Jean is a nanpa stalker.
|Ninja Slayer From Animation (ONA)||Not really good|
I am aware of the history of the franchise, and I get what Trigger were trying to go for. But the show itself is basically one big in-joke, and this particular brand of humour is an acquired taste. If it doesn't appeal to you - it didn't for me - then there's actually nothing else to like here. (Well, except for the opening theme song.) I know it's a bit predictable to say this, but had this show been Kill la Kill with ninjas it would have been a lot better.
|Ray (TV)||Not really good|
"This is one hell of a hospital," moans a thug at one point before passing out. Yes indeed. And that's a problem. The hospital in Ray - where the series looks like it will be largely set - is so daft it ruins suspension of disbelief. The kung-fu practising nurses, and the (literally) "tempestuous" hospital director modeled off Blackbeard are also completely ridiculous. Then there's the medical "science", where apparently tumours can shrink at will and even retreat into an organ to to hide from the scalpel. It's like the original mangaka - Akihito Yoshitomi, who also penned the diverse Blue Drop and Eat Man - didn't even try to make the medical side of the story realistic.
Ray - the character - has magical eyes that allows her to see through solid objects (Superman-style x-ray vision, basically), and yet that's the easiest thing to accept in the show thus far. As a young girl she was in some sort of obviously evil facility, and the lingering trauma from that ordeal is conveyed surprisingly well. She was rescued and given those eyes by no less than Black Jack himself, which make her an ace at surgery and first-aid, and now she wants to use her ability to save others. Even having seen just one episode I found her to be likeable and sympathetic, someone who takes the job of treating people very seriously because she knows first-hand how life-changing a good doctor can be. That's actually a fairly compelling narrative, and Ray is by far the best part of her show. While that's not saying much, given how bad everything else is, the show would have been far far worse without a quality lead character such as herself.
So yeah. The premise is a respectably decent one and the lead character is a very good one (it's nice to see an adult in the driver's seat rather than a teenager). Both it and her deserved better than this.
|Terror in Resonance (TV)||Not really good|
|Ultimate Otaku Teacher (TV)||Not really good|
There are many forms of otaku wish fulfilment. Examples include - but are by no means limited to - a magical girlfriend dropping (often literally) into your life; being transported to a fantasy land where you get to become the hero who will save the kingdom and marry the princess; and being the sole male member of a wacky high school club. Now it's time to add another one to the list; using your otaku skills to become a fantastic teacher. Okay, so there was Outbreak Company, but that was an extremely fun and clever parody, and the teaching aspect was prominent but not front and centre.
In fact, Ultimate Otaku Teacher more closely resembles (to the pointing of aping) Great Teacher Onizuka, only with an otaku instead of a gang member. Does it hold up well? Kind of. UOT is more realistic than GTO, and the consequences are more serious. However it is so concerned with promoting otakudom that it forgets to be funny. And I usually like listening to Hiroshi Kamiya but his performance here got on my nerves.
So yeah, UOT is otaku wish fulfilment done poorly. Which should come as little shock to anyone.
|Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon? (TV)||So-so|
Not nearly as bad as I thought it would be, but still difficult to watch.
|Mikagura School Suite (TV)||So-so|
Whether you enjoy this series or not largely depends on whether its hyperactive female lead (who provides virtually all of the comedy) and the school battling system work for you. They didn't for me, so I found it kinda boring.
|Panzer World Galient (TV)||So-so|
|Not bad for 1984, but everyone in this show - except for Hilmuka - is an utter moron. At least the villain had an interesting and thought-provoking motive (hah; pun very much intended).|
Oh my god this show was a chore to watch. It isn't bad per se - although it isn't good either - but I was bored out of my skull. It's mind-numbingly generic, and while it isn't lifeless it is absolutely dull. It is baffling that the guy who directed this also helmed Outlaw Star. The thought of facing another fourteen episodes of this mire was daunting and I just couldn't muster the energy to give a damn and continue on with it. Which is sad in a way, because the plot was finally getting into gear, and the main character was finally opening up a little and becoming more likeable. Ah well, I did give the series plenty of time to win me over so I don't have anything to apologise for.
|Urawa no Usagi-chan (TV)||So-so|
Short anime that is just a tourism advertisement for a city. Episode didn't leave an impression on me one way or another.
|Patlabor the Mobile Police (TV)||Decent|
Its goofiness and all the slapstick content make it difficult to take seriously. I wasn't expecting Section 9 levels of professionalism but come on . . .
Anyway, it's not terrible but it's not for me.
|Hellsing Ultimate (OAV)||Good|
|In Search of the Lost Future (TV)||Good|
|The high school friendship side of things was quite strong, and it was an emotionally moving story. But it did take a knock with dodgy (and confusingly messy) time travel mechanics, and the whole "fated death" nonsense was tiring and had no real business being in a science fiction show. But I enjoyed In Search of the Lost Future a lot more than its quality would suggest, mostly because I really cared about the characters. On entertainment value you can bump up the grade to an 8/10.|
|Log Horizon (TV 2)||Good|
|Hikaru no Go (TV)||Excellent|
|Monthly Girls' Nozaki-kun (TV)||Excellent|
|Aishiteruze Baby (TV)|
|Baby Steps (TV 2)|
|Binbō Shimai Monogatari (TV)|
|Blood Blockade Battlefront (TV)|
|Bokura ga Ita (TV)|
|Casshern Sins (TV)|
|Code Geass: Akito the Exiled (OAV)|
|CROSS ANGE Rondo of Angel and Dragon (TV)|
|Daily Lives of High School Boys (TV)|
|Death Parade (TV)|
|Digimon Adventure tri. (TV)|
|(The) Disappearance of Nagato Yuki chan (TV)|
|Excel Saga (TV)|
|Eyeshield 21 (TV)|
|Fate/stay night: Unlimited Blade Works (TV)|
|Fate/stay night: Unlimited Blade Works (TV 2)|
|Full Moon o Sagashite (TV)|
|Garo: Honoo no Kokuin (TV)|
|Ghost in the Shell Arise: Alternative Architecture (TV)|
|Gourmet Girl Graffiti (TV)|
|Gunslinger Stratos: The Animation (TV)|
|Hell Girl (TV)|
|Hello!! KINMOZA (TV)|
|(The) Heroic Legend of Arslan (TV)|
|Hidamari Sketch × 365 (TV)|
|Hidamari Sketch × Honeycomb (TV)|
|Hidamari Sketch × Hoshimittsu (TV)|
|Hidamari Sketch × Hoshimittsu (special)|
|His and Her Circumstances (TV)|
|I Can't Understand What My Husband is Saying: 2nd Thread (TV 2)|
|Kamisama Hajimemashita (TV 2)|
|Knights of Sidonia: Battle for Planet Nine (TV)|
|Kurokami The Animation (TV)|
|Looking Up At The Half-Moon (TV)|
|Lovely Complex (TV)|
|Lupin the Third (TV 2015)|
|Maria the Virgin Witch (TV)|
|Mind Game (movie)|
|Mobile Suit Gundam (TV)|
|Mobile Suit Gundam Seed C.E.73: Stargazer (ONA)|
|Moonlight Mile 2nd Season - Touch Down (TV)|
|My Love Story!! (TV)|
|My Teen Romantic Comedy SNAFU TOO! (TV)|
|(The) Mysterious Cities of Gold (TV)|
|Now and Then, Here and There (TV)|
|Our Home's Fox Deity (TV)|
|Parasyte -the maxim- (TV)|
|Plastic Memories (TV)|
|R.O.D -The TV-|
|Rage of Bahamut: Genesis (TV)|
|Revolutionary Girl Utena (TV)|
|RIN - Daughters of Mnemosyne (TV)|
|Rurouni Kenshin (TV)|
|Rurouni Kenshin: New Kyoto Arc (OAV)|
|Saekano: How to Raise a Boring Girlfriend (TV)|
|Selector Spread Wixoss (TV)|
|(The) Seven Deadly Sins (TV)|
|Shigurui: Death Frenzy (TV)|
|Shonen Onmyouji (TV)|
|Show By Rock!! (TV)|
|Skip Beat! (TV)|
|Solty Rei (TV)|
|Sound! Euphonium (TV)|
|(The) Third: The Girl with the Blue Eye (TV)|
|Tokyo Ghoul (TV)|
|Tokyo Ghoul √A (TV)|
|(The) Tower of Druaga: the Sword of Uruk (TV)|
|Twin Spica (TV)|
|Wish Upon the Pleiades (TV)|
|Yamada-kun and the Seven Witches (TV)|
|Yatterman Night (TV)|
|Yona of the Dawn (TV)|
|Your Lie in April (TV)|
|Yurikuma Arashi (TV)|