Chainsmoker Cat

Episode 8

Oh my god. I never even imagined that a day like this was possible. I always recognized that Chainsmoker Cat was a fantasy, set in a world where the natural laws are not subject to the petty grievances of our own plane of existence. Yet here I am, staring gobsmacked at my screen over this week's flagrant violations of the most sacred rules that govern time and space. That's right: Kaoru has a brother. Sound the alarms of the Internet Horny Jails across the world. This is not a drill. Chainsmoker Cat has given us a mischievous little beatboxing catboy with sharp teeth and a messy bowl cut, and he positively radiates incestual subtext.

Oh, yeah, and our good Landlord friend gets trapped in a ludicrous time loop that can only be unraveled by the reality warping power of his massive schlong. That's basically just another day at the office for these cats, though, so we can breeze through all of that once we reckon with Shunran, the shitty little gremlin-cat who will almost certainly inspire the most deranged doujinshi and fan-fiction this side of artist's alley. It's not like the punk isn't asking for it though, what with how he spends his time stealing his sister's underwear and loudly announcing that he's her boyfriend to complete strangers. Don't worry though, y'all. He's totally just doing pranks for the love of the game. Kind of like the catgirls all prank their landlord by nearly suffocating him to death in the night with their used panties! Classic.

Before we get to the episode's craziest segment, though, we are allowed some time to enjoy more slice-of-life skits with the gals that are plenty fun in their own right. Between Yani blowing out the saddest birthday cake with cigarette candles you ever did see to watching Kaoru make friends with a sweet classmate of hers before Yani makes the whole thing weird with her casual nudity, there's something here to enjoy for every stripe of Chainsmoker Cat fan. Unless, that is, you are a fan of the idea that someone might take some initiative and send Aru to rehab for her genuinely concerning alcohol addiction, in which case you are shit out of luck. I am calling it now: That cat is going to die on screen before the end of this season.

Well, I mean she's going to permanently die, since we've already now seen all of the girls die horribly stupid deaths during the Landlord's mochi-pounding time loop misadventure. In addition to somehow escalating the stakes of the shameless penis jokes beyond what I thought could even be allowed by Japanese Standards and Practices, this was a very fun sequence for me personally, since I actually got to take a fun mochi pounding class during my trip to Japan this summer. It's always fun when you can do the “point and whistle in recognition” meme from Once Upon a Time…in Hollywood, and that mochi ended up tasting delicious. Thankfully, none of the guides we met went so far as to knock a nicotine junkie unconscious with their violently undulating genitals before getting carted off by the police. That would have made for a very different Yelp review, I tell you what.

Episode Rating:

Chainsmoker Cat is currently streaming on Netflix and OceanVeil.

James is a writer with many thoughts and feelings about anime and other pop-culture, which can also be found on BlueSky, his blog, and his podcast.