Utawarerumono: The False Faces

Episode 24

One episode away from the grand finale of U2warerumono, and everyone has decided to be a big ole baby about absolutely everything. Yamato may be a mighty empire, but I'd much rather live in Tusukuru where it seems like most people have at least a lick of common sense.

Surprise to no one: Vurai doesn't give a rat's ass whether Oshutoru actually poisoned the princess or not. In his mind's eye, the little lady is too young to rule the country (he might be right about that), and he should be the new emperor in her place until she comes of age (but he's definitely wrong about that). Now that he finally has his opportunity to snatch the throne, nothing's going to stop him now. However, Vurai is nothing if not loyal to the emperor, so he at least grants Oshutoru, the late emperor's favorite, equal footing in this final fight for his life. He tosses the General of the Right's lost mask at his feet and challenges him to a Legendary Pokémon Akuruturuka Battle!

Seeing as the only characterization Haku ever got came from his disgust and fear of Vurai, I had kind of hoped Haku would be the one to challenge him in this penultimate battle. Silly me, that might actually add some unexpected tension to this meandering nonsense, and we can't have that! The stakes continue to linger at shrug levels as the two Generals turn into big goofy monsters and our protagonist just sits on his hands and watches, no doubt waiting for his (still woefully unexplained) deus ex machina powers to kick in by the end of the fight. It's a disappointing non-climax for our supposed hero, but more importantly, what the heck are the other Pillar Generals doing?

Much like Haku, Yamato's most trusted warriors are just loafing around with a "meh." I don't get it! This is not a meh situation! (And even if it was, please at least try to inject some enthusiasm into the end of this series, guys!) The clash of the Akuruturuka collapses buildings, sets off fiery explosions, and even floods part of the city. By all rights, there should be a human toll to all this, and the Generals should be busy evacuating the capitol even if they don't want to stop the fight, but U2warerumono turned its world into a weirdly sterile video game map long ago, and I guess there's no going back to nuance, even when your plot supposedly revolves around political intrigue and power imbalances.

The only Pillar General who thinks to maybe get off his butt and start doing his job is Mikazuchi, mostly out of concern for his best friend, but a few words from Raikou stop him dead in his tracks. The Generals have unanimously decided to just let these two titans tear each other to shreds, collateral damage be damned, at which point they will step in and execute the exhausted victor of the pair. Wait, so the plan is to endanger the populace, causing further unrest and chaos, not to mention untold property damage and insane body counts, then just end it all by ridding the country of its two most powerful (and single most popular) military leaders? If the emperor was still alive, this plan would be considered downright treasonous, good for absolutely no one in the country. Well okay, it's good for one person. This is obviously a scheme meant to benefit Raikou, so he can slither onto the throne once there's no general more powerful to stop him, and it's absolutely idiotic that none of the other Pillar Boys see through it. Come on guys, when did all of you become Dekoponpo?

As if all this senseless chest-thumping couldn't get any worse, the yin-yang twins reveal that they have the power to seal an Akuruturuka any time they please—after the battle has already raged for an entire episode. Great hustle, ladies! Admittedly, sealing Vurai's Akuruturuka form does fuse the mask to his face and cause him to go mad, but it was going to be a fight to the death anyway. If you're trying to protect Oshutoru, who lest we forget is severely wounded and only hurts himself more by activating his own mask-monster form, just do that at the start and cut your losses later. There was no good reason to wait things out while the capitol gets decimated and Oshutoru risks death even if he somehow manages to win the fight.

Whatever. When it becomes obvious that Oshutoru is not going to win with his injuries, the Kamanagi of Chains activate their sealing powers and turn Vurai human again, just with glowing red-eyes and a god-monster brain. He immediately starts freaking out, turning his furious fists toward Nekone, which means Haku finally gets his chance to do something! I have no idea what that something was, but he sure did it! When Vurai's fists connect with Haku's fan, our hero bursts into flame, in an echo of Kuon's awakening scene last episode. Unfortunately, I'm having a lot of trouble connecting the dots on this one. We know that Haku got upgraded to Human 2.0 by his brother's experiments, but I thought this would mean connecting him back to Witsalnamitea in some way. Just seeing him burst into flame when a human-Akuruturuka punches him doesn't tell me much, and it adds nothing to the final battle overall. Once Vurai's been sealed, the fight is over, Haku-flames or no Haku-flames. Oshutoru changes back as well, then uses the last of his strength to put the mad dog down.

As Nekone tries to heal her brother's wounds with a dismayed look on her face, our heroic doppelganger bros fantasize about running away to Ennakamui together, reuniting with the princess and Kuon, and living happily ever after, which tells me that Oshutoru might not live to see the next episode. Or maybe he will! I can't tell at this point, because U2warerumono keeps derailing anything that could be dramatically cathartic into another series of time-filler battles. On the one hand, I think the only emotionally meaningful outcome to this whole mess would be Oshutoru's tragic death, but on the other hand, the story hasn't really done the legwork to make it mean as much as it could have. What is the great general really passing onto Haku? What has Haku even done in this story to earn a torch-passing, aside from strategize from the sidelines and blindly accept what everyone else tells him to do or think? There's just one more episode of U2warerumono to go, but one thing's for certain: when I recommend Utawarerumono to people in the future, it'll be as a one-season only experience.

Rating: D

Utawarerumono: The False Faces is currently streaming on Crunchyroll.

Jake has been an anime fan since childhood, and likes to chat about cartoons, pop culture, and visual novel dev on Twitter.