Utawarerumono: The False Faces

Episode 25

"So, where's Haku?" Kuon asks.

Oh, U2warerumono. How dumb do you think we are?

In what I can only assume is a last-ditch attempt to make this finale memorable, the first five minutes of episode 25 are done in the style of a silent film, with only soaring music and intertitles to accompany the animation. Of course, given that we mostly see Kuon wandering through the mountains, revisiting her hometown, and staring wistfully over vistas, it was probably also an attempt to pad out a finale where almost nothing happens. After Oshutoru and the yin-yang twins reunite with the girls to report Haku's death, it's basically an eye-rolling countdown to when they're going to reveal that it's really Haku under the mask. Thanks to this show's careless structure, we aren't even allowed to mourn with Kuon or believe the deception for even a second. It was obvious last week that Oshutoru was mortally wounded, and gee these two jokers have the same face.

Still, one measly mask wouldn't be nearly enough to fool Kuon, so the Kamanagi of Chains actually use their magic to change Haku's voice, eye color, put the late Oshutoru's beauty mark on his face, and um...part his hair differently. Girls, you don't need magic for that, you can just use a comb. Heck, if they can transform that many details with magic, it almost seems pointless for the two heroes to be doppelgangers at all! Regardless, after many lingering minutes of waiting for the reveal and getting more and more depressed at Kuon's heartbroken expression, the show finally reveals that Oshutoru overused his mask powers in that final battle with Vurai, and must now turn into salt. As Nekone clutches at the delicious seasoning that was once her big brother, Haku takes his place so the other generals won't know that the status quo has changed. Alright! Now we can expose Yamato's corruption from the inside!

Oh wait no, Haku's first act as the new General of the Right is to declare war on other countries to try and find the traitor, because U2warerumono has decided that we're all incredibly stupid. It's really going to devote an entire third game (and season of the show) to tearing up the countryside when we know that this had to be an inside job? Raikou is the most obvious culprit in the series of assassination plots, but we just get to watch him twiddle his fingers for who knows how long while we attack more nations that, like Tusukuru, are probably way cooler than the empire of Yamato to begin with. The calls are coming from inside the house, Haku! Stop wasting more lives and the audience's precious time!

Kuon's fate just piles insult onto injury in this forced finale. Nekone and the yin-yang twins already know that Haku has taken Oshutoru's place. Does he really trust those three characters more than Kuon? She's proven herself incredibly steadfast and trustworthy through all of this, to the extent that she was willing to betray her own homeland to stay at Haku's side. (Or she would have if that subplot led anywhere, instead of just fizzling out with a shrug and yet more wasted time.) Anyway, I'm pretty sure she can play it cool with Haku's secret and even stay away from him for as long as he's taking Oshutoru's place. At least she wouldn't be tortured with grief! Instead, we get the dweeby cliché "I can only reach for you from the shadows for your protection" spiel from Haku before he proceeds to show no caution or foresight at all by invading surrounding nations, all because he's boiling too hot over his brother and bestie's respective deaths.

For first-season fans, we get about a two-second glimpse of Oboro as Kuon weeps and screams in his arms. Lovely. What a waste of potential this entire series was! First, we waited half the season for the plot to start at all, and then once the story got going, it waffled between bland, anti-climactic, and just plain stupid. My writeup is actually a full week late because in light of the hectic pre-spring-season week, I completely forgot that Utawarerumono: The False Faces even existed. I watched this episode, took some notes, took a screencap, rolled my eyes out of my skull, and then completely forgot about the whole experience the second I had other work to do. Even if there turns out to be a third season on the way, U2warerumono is best left forgotten.

Rating: C-

Utawarerumono: The False Faces is currently streaming on Crunchyroll.

Jake has been an anime fan since childhood, and likes to chat about cartoons, pop culture, and visual novel dev on Twitter.