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Vice & Luna - #1


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Hiroki not Takuya



Joined: 17 Apr 2012
Posts: 2534
PostPosted: Tue Jun 21, 2016 9:54 pm Reply with quote
Zac wrote:
...Hiroki not Takuya: You have my sincere apologies that this strip disappointed you so much, hopefully what we're making can improve in your eyes.
I'll do this anime-style, "don't get the wrong idea, I wasn't looking forward to this so I'm not disappointed in the slightest". I would like a good successor to 'Nina and I gave my opinion and some suggestions on how that might be done. The viewers will let you know if it is that or not.
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dangerwhat



Joined: 22 Jul 2007
Posts: 187
Location: Central Florida
PostPosted: Wed Jun 22, 2016 7:46 am Reply with quote
Glad to see a new comic. I'll look forward to it. Also, Luna is hot.
....I mean, the art is good.
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HdE



Joined: 17 Nov 2015
Posts: 50
PostPosted: Wed Jun 22, 2016 10:19 pm Reply with quote
I love fun little features like this! Looks like this'll be fun to watch over the course of future instalments. The artwork's superb.

One point of serious crit, though, which I'd offer through the filter of somebody working full time lettering indie comics - this needs professional quality lettering to really stand out.

I've seen FAR worse, but the balloon shapes and arrangement of text in the captions lets things down a lot. Break some of that text over several caption boxes - it'll help immeasurably.

In fact, Zac - I'm pretty busy, but feel free to get in touch if you'd like some more specific pointers. I'd really love to see this get that extra coat of polish it deserves.

Lettering might seem like the lowest of concerns in a comic, but when its tweaked and done right, it has the effect of flipping a hidden switch that makes everything else look so much cooler.
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Hmph!



Joined: 20 Jun 2014
Posts: 26
PostPosted: Wed Jun 29, 2016 1:14 am Reply with quote
The transition from the snarky, "don't-take-itself-seriously" exposition to the introduction of the main casts feels kinda awkward and rushed, to be honest. It is as if the writer, realizing that he'd accidentally nearly filled the chapter with his rambling on the setting and still didn't introduce the main casts, slap the two casts on the end of the chapter and be done with it. I can't say I'm impressed yet as of now but subsequent chapters might overturn my impression Rolling Eyes
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Joe Carpenter



Joined: 29 Oct 2011
Posts: 503
PostPosted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 7:57 pm Reply with quote
The thought of a fairy squirting peoples' buttcracks with a water gun is hilarious. Laughing Laughing
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wizard626



Joined: 24 Jul 2006
Posts: 16
PostPosted: Thu Jul 28, 2016 11:55 pm Reply with quote
For whatever reason, I actually skimmed the first page of forum post before going back up to the comic and wow... some of the criticism in here was overblown for 1-2 pages worth of comic. First, it's SUPPOSED to be a ridiculous premise. Second, the last bit isn't "shoehorned" so much, as it is abrupt to undercut the over the top exposition. That's what I see anyways. Should be fun. At the least, great insight into how people react towards critics having a little fun with their own fiction. Unfortunately, I didn't catch Anime News Nina so I don't have anything to compare it to but I'm interested -- mostly because they already had me trying to guess what role gnomes do play in all this.
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GDMaid Man



Joined: 19 Jan 2011
Posts: 71
PostPosted: Tue Aug 02, 2016 8:32 pm Reply with quote
The Hubble telescope faerie should of had glasses on.
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