World's End Harem

Episode 9

No, the site didn't glitch out on you. That thumbnail is an actual screencap from World’s End Harem, and it's far from the worst example I could have chosen.

If, unlike me, you are smart and have not been keeping up with this moth-eaten wannabe porn rag, now might be the best time for you to pop back in and witness World’s End Harem at its most farcical. The gratuitous and gratuitously censored sexcapades of our spineless protagonist Doi have never been more hilariously staid. Our former protagonist Reito has been utterly reduced to Scooby Doo status, moping in the background while other characters with more personality drag him around an abandoned hospital. And the big conspiracy plot explodes with all the seismic strength of a mouse fart, undermining any of its potency with slapdash writing and even lazier deus ex machina. It's a disastrous episode, and honestly, I loved it.

There's really nothing to be said about Doi's side of the story that I didn't cover last week. Although he once again takes up half of the runtime, his arc only amounts to an interminable puddle of viscous bodily fluids, and it's about as appealing as stepping in one. This is just a product of amateurish writing, but it's unintentionally telling how much Doi keeps blaming his sociopathic depravity on the world's circumstances. While they are, admittedly, fucked up, he's still the guy who chose to become Patrick Bateman rather than practice a modicum of humility or self-awareness.

It's not even about the banging anymore; it's all just a power trip for him. As if to drive that point home, the sex in World’s End Harem has never been less sexy. This is, in part, thanks to the inherent irony of the show's particularly brash brand of censorship—as the orgies grow more explicit, the void swallows more of the image. This finally reaches its climax, so to speak, with a wholly black screen at the start of Doi's pre-bath rubdown. I was howling. And while the censors do a great job making this show a lot funnier (that shot of their four tongues slowly Voltroning together into one big jpeg artifact will forever stay with me), it's not like their absence would make World’s End Harem any more titillating. It has no grasp of eroticism beyond exposed boobs and butts. Doi just sits there like a slab of granite while the girls lather him up, and the camera haphazardly pans around the image as if commandeered by a blackout drunk operator. Honestly, it's worth it to watch this dreck if only to compare it to Vanitas for an excellent contemporary exhibition of how to make properly salacious animation.

Reito, meanwhile, may as well not be here anymore. He's not plowing anybody, he's not making any of the decisions, and he certainly hasn't grown a personality yet. I like that we get some haunted hospital banter between the members of his entourage, and Akane is ever the blessing for teasing our “hero” into submission, but they could be dragging around a cardboard cutout of him and it would make no difference. This is what happens when you take a protagonist who barely has enough momentum to begin with and stuff him into a trunk for multiple episodes. Chloe has to show up again to bail his ass out, which is a welcome development, but further proof that any contribution Reito makes to the story is tertiary at best. Why would I care about this potato when there's an international paramilitary outfit being led by a woman who's wearing a tube top so tight it's making her chest coconuts turn concave? Clearly the series can do tastelessness right and have fun with it, so why can't it do it more often? I shouldn't have to scour the floor for these scant few scraps of titanic-titted absurdity.

Most bizarre of all is how the MK virus conspiracy sprints back into the spotlight only to get resolved in a laughable concatenation of anticlimaxes carried out by characters whom we barely know the names of. The main thrust here is that the Japan branch of the UW is somehow the only one in the world with a collection of immune men, which isn't explained, but I'll play nice and assume it has to do with the fact that they were also the ones who made the virus. The thing is, despite the council being a constant background presence, we still know nothing about their motives or methods, so it's impossible to care about them being apprehended. The cherry on top is Reito's side of the equation, where after weeks of buildup, Scooby and the gang literally stumble headfirst into the top secret killer virus research facility. A big-breasted American, doing her country proud, kills the lead scientist before she can divulge any secrets, and the lab explodes before anyone can learn anything. Normally, a setback like this leaves the main characters with a small but useful scrap of information that can spur further plot developments, but they literally leave with nothing. They may as well have not gone there in the first place. Given, however, that the UW's idea of espionage was sending a very loud and very nude woman to wage a sauna stamina war with their target, I can definitely believe that they'd fumble things this badly.

I cannot tell you how delighted I was to hear that Doi got kidnapped by terrorists off camera. It's the perfect note to end the episode on—the loathsome humping patsy is finally reduced to a meat bargaining chip, and we can't even be bothered to watch it happen. It's what he deserves. Karen, meanwhile, saw the writing on the wall and prepared herself to flip to whichever side comes out on top in this little skirmish, which makes her a more proactive and more interesting character than either of our leads. She's evil, but she's not an idiot, and that's what's most important. She's ready for the fire when it comes, which I hope bodes true, because World’s End Harem could stand to be on fire more often. And with only two episodes left, it'll need to be a roaring inferno if it hopes to reach any kind of satisfying conclusion. I'm not nearly delusional enough to believe it can pull that off, of course, but I can hope for some more laughs as it tumbles toes over tits into the finish line.

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World’s End Harem is currently streaming on Crunchyroll.

Steve can be found on Twitter if you want to read his World’s End Harem livetweets. Otherwise, catch him chatting about trash and treasure alike on This Week in Anime.