Hell Teacher: Jigoku Sensei Nube

Episode 7

So far, teacher Nube's love life hasn't been what one might call “successful.” The only adult female character of note that he's interacted with so far is fellow faculty member Ms. Ritsuko, and their short conversations usually end in her either screaming and running away or slapping him in the face. He can't help from blurting out horrifying supernatural gibberish in her rather fragile presence. Mischievous student Miki only compounds Nube's woes when she confirms, using various methods of divination, that his love destiny is nothing short of cursed. Even her Tarot card readings reveal seven upright “death” cards, which is an impressive level of impossible, even if they probably ought to have been "the tower." It stands to reason then, that if Nube's luck with human women is always fated to remain abysmal, why not look for love with a willing yokai lady? This week's guest antagonist is more than willing to cross the inter-species relationship bridge.

Yuki-onna (literal translation: “snow woman”) are prominent yokai from Japanese folklore who frequently appear in anime – the oldest example that springs to mind is Urusei Yatsura's friendly yet aloof Oyuki. Hell Teacher: Jigoku Sensei Nube's Yukime is a beautiful blue-haired Yuki-onna who descends from the mountains, bringing an unseasonably wintry snowstorm in her wake, carpeting the entire city in a thick blanket of snow, and freezing the lakes. She shares some history with Nube: while a college student, he rescued Yukime as a ten-year-old Yukinko (child Yuki-onna) from a hunter, leading her to declare eternal love for him, promising to seek him out for marriage once reaching adulthood. Unable to hear her over the raging snowstorm, Nube smiled and gave her a thumbs-up, only compounding her motivation. Now she's returned to claim her soon-to-be popsicle husband, though Nube's not keen on shacking up with a 15-year-old ice girl around a decade his junior.

Nube's attempts to discourage her via deliberately unsuitable dates are genuinely humorous. First, he takes her to a roasting hot beef restaurant, before trying both a steaming sauna and a sweltering rock concert. Yukime takes all of these experiences in her stride, merely using her powers to freeze everything solid. Her ultimate aim is to freeze Nube himself, so they may spend an eternity loving one another in the ice. That doesn't sound like much fun, but Nube's attempts to extricate himself from her womanly wiles don't go well.

Thankfully, Nube's trusty students have been stalking the awkward couple the entire time, both Miki and Kyoko unreasonably desperate to witness the moment of a love confession, while the boys seem to have been dragged along for the ride. It's only by their intervention that Nube gains the opportunity to fight back against the increasingly terrifying, unhinged Yukime. She even sends massive ice javelins flying down from the sky after the fleeing kids! It's a wonder none of them are skewered horribly, their ice-rent corpses sent fractured and bloody across the landscape, but I guess it's not that kind of anime.

While the kids' devotion to their hapless teacher warms Yukime's heart and halts her rampage, she still steals a proper smooch from him before leaving. She's a really fun character, and it seems she had a recurring role in the original story, so I hope she returns again to this version soon. Her attractive blue-themed design shows that if this episode teaches us anything, it's that yandere ice girls are hot.

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Hell Teacher: Jigoku Sensei Nube is currently streaming on YouTube.