The List 7 Mostly Harmless Dirty Old Men
Jun 15th 2013
Dirty old men are a dime a dozen in anime and often work as a series' comic relief. At some point, an unspoken rule was established that the level of perversion is greater than or equal to grandpa's fighting prowess. The entries on the list start as more or less harmless, weird old dudes before reaching the ultimate pervert fighter senior hybrid.
7. Mr. Cat (Princess Tutu) So, Mr. Cat is more of a old catman than human man, but he's not one to be swayed by such barriers as species. He works as the ballet teacher at the Gold Crown Academy and finds the best way to motivate his students is to threaten them with a trip down a church aisle, and it isn't entirely made in jest. When Duck agrees to it once after a particularly bad day, Mr. Cat spends the rest of the episode waiting to meet her in a restaurant for a date.
6. Zenzou Kotoura (Kotoura-san) Psychic-girl Kotoura's grandpa is insanely wealthy. Wealthy enough to build an entire theme park in her honor and run an immaculate household. All the old man really wants is for his high-school age daughter to sit on his lap and maybe parade around in a bathing suit. Actually, it's all pretty skeevy but the show presents Zenzou as loving Kotoura as much as a grandpa should. In a familial way. Mostly.
5. Edward "The Elder" Hamilton (Chrono Crusade) The Elder is a scientist for the Magdalan Order with a focus on weapon development. In his free time, he enjoys harassing the girls at the convent with fondling requests, especially Rosette. He's shown care about his comrades though, with ties tracing back to Mary Magdalene's childhood.
4. Rei's Grandpa (Sailor Moon) Rei's grandpa loves his daughter's friends, especially if they'll spend some money at the shrine and maybe flirt with him a little bit. However, his habits became notorious enough that the shrine he runs starts to get bad press. In the anime, his abilities as a priest are greatly heightened by being a reincarnated youma named Jiji and a carrier of a piece of the Silver Crystal.
3. Kensei Ma (KenIchi the Mightiest Disciple) Kensai Ma is the master of Chinese Kenpo and notorious voyeur. He begins to train Kenichi in the arts of Kenpo, usually with a perverted demonstration like catching a female combatant's kicks and rubbing his head in her breasts. It's hard to believe a guy who snaps pictures of girls' underwear also has a 17-year-old daughter.
2. Master Roshi (Dragon Ball) A martial arts master who trained one of the word's greatest heroes is over 300-years-old and no less a pervert from it. Some of his favorite hobbies include watching women's aerobics on television and reading porn mags. He regularly comes on to Bulma, Launch, and Maron with absolute confidence that he's the hottest thing since sliced bread. His fighting prowess is also exceptional, I mean, he taught Goku the Kamehameha.
1. Happosai (Ranma 1/2) The creator of "Anything Goes Martial Arts" spends most of his off time raiding the closets of women for their underwear. Happosai's addiction to women is actually intense enough that he goes through withdrawals if he's unable to touch a woman, going so far as to lose some of his powers and crawl around on the ground until he gets a "fix." As the founder of the martial arts style used by the Tendo and Saotome families, Happosai's powers are unmatched, with the possible exception of Shampoo's grandmother, Cologne.
The new poll: Which of the listed demon kings would rule supreme?
The old poll: Last week's poll asked which restaurant would you most like to eat at. I was surprised that Polar Bear's Café did not win, and took 3rd overall. Here's the full results:
- Wagnaria (Working!!) 13.1%
- Russia Sushi (Durarara!!) 11.8%
- Polar Bear's Café (Polar Bear's Café) 11.2%
- Floating Restaurant Baratie (One Piece) 11.0%
- Ichiraku Ramen (Naruto) 9.9%
- Time of Eve (Time of Eve) 8.4%
- Ucchan's Okonomiyaki (Ranma 1/2) 6.2%
- Angel*Mort (Higurashi no Naku Koro ni) 5.9%
- Casetta dell'Orso (Ristorante Paradiso) 5.8%
- Antique Bakery (Antique Bakery) 5.3%
- Nyan Nyan Chinese Restaurant (Macross) 4.6%
- Cafe Mew Mew (Tokyo Mew Mew) 4.5%
- Eden Hall (Bartender) 2.4%
Alright everybody, see you all next week! I look forward to your input in the comments and feel free to follow me on Twitter @ANN_Lynzee or e-mail me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
discuss this in the forum (39 posts) |
this article has been modified since it was originally posted; see change history