The Click June 7th - 13th
by Brian Hanson,
In the interest of full disclosure: I don't have anything particularly clever or introspective to say in this opening statement. But, hey, welcome to The Click again! Despite the slow, agonizing death perpetrated upon broadcast television wrought by the internet, affecting anime in particular, there's still quite a lot of shows this week, so let's get on with this cavalcade of incandescent goodness!
This is exciting, at least to me, because it isn't often I get to heap praises upon something that is unequivocally deserving of such plaudits. Satoshi Kon is one of the best and most interesting directors working in animation today, and Paprika only reinforces why - his stories are grounded with realistic, fleshed-out, compelling characters, yet are filled with the sort of bizarre flights of fancy and psychedelia that are only possible in animation. Despite being produced on a relatively shoestring budget, any five minutes of Paprika are more inventive and beautiful than most any other feature-length animated films I can think of. Which is to say that the DVD is out now, and you should buy it! But if you're looking for a low-investment opportunity to catch this wonderful movie, and happen to have the Starz Edge channel on your cable/satellite lineup, than by all means, set your TiVo's or internal clocks now.
-Saturday June 7 11:00am - Episode 64 "Survival"
-Saturday June 7 11:30am - Episode 65 "Curtain Call"
-Saturday June 7 12:00pm - Episode 66 "Hard Time"
For those of you cursing your luck to be Canadian residents, lacking the usual comforts and perks of being a TV-watching United States citizen, Robotech is here to soothe your jangled nerves. Robotech's return to the intergalactic-themed SPACE channel's lineup is a good chance to see, without the crutch of nostalgia, what turned a good lot of us into diseased maniacs for this Jap-Anime-Toon stuff.
The Bakugan Brawlers' go MacGuffin-hunting for something called the "Infinity Core" which no doubt has its share of perils and metaphorical pitfalls, and of course no end of evil hounds their travails.
Sunday June 8 12:00am - Episode 67 (Repeats Sun June 8 3:00am)
Ichigo's newest foe, the diminutive trickster Ririn, has cast a spell upon his entire student body, and it's up to him to play her sadistic little parlor games in order to save them all. NO PRESSURE OR ANYTHING.
Saturday June 7 9:00am - Episode 11 “Ambush”
Shu and the titular Blue Dragon go up against their newest foe, the EVIL General Logi, in order to reach the next save point and go to bed and not be all groggy at work in the morning.
Sunday June 8 1:00am - Episode 7 "Attack Cornelia" (Repeats Sun June 8 4:00am)
Lelouch's crimefighting alter-ego, Zero, is trapped by the clever Cornelia, putting his identity and ideals and all that vigilante jazz in jeopardy! And being in any kind of jeopardy sucks!
Sunday June 8 12:30am - Episode 33 "Scorn" (Repeats Sun June 8 3:30am)
Friday June 13 10:00pm - Episode 33 "Scorn" (Repeats Sat June 14 1:30am)
Near is hot on Light's trail, but of course Light is too cocksure and smart to not already know this, so various precautions are taken involving his various subordinates. Sounds like a recipe... for wackiness!
Kyo kara Maoh!
-Tuesday June 10 7:30pm - Episode 60 “Big Brother's Anguish” (Repeats Tue June 10 10:30pm, Wed June 11 3:00am, 3:00pm)
-Tuesday June 10 8:00pm - Episode 61 “Another Demon King” (Repeats Tue June 10 11:00pm, Wed June 11 3:30am, 3:30pm)
Yuri finds out that there's a Demon King of Earth, of all things, and that he's located in Switzerland, the land of fine chocolate and aggressive neutrality, but things go mildly awry concerning Yuri's parents, who no doubt have some secrets of their own, as they all do.
-Saturday June 7 9:00pm - Episode 172 “Despair: A Fractured Heart”
-Saturday June 7 9:30pm - Episode 173 “Battle at Sea: The Power Unleashed”
-Friday June 13 8:00pm - Episode 140 "Two Heartbeats: Kabuto's Trap"
-Friday June 13 8:30pm - Episode 141 "Sakura's Determination"
In a way, I kind of like how sometimes the filler episodes give some, however hokey, backstory to the various tertiary Naruto characters, such as Anko in the pair of this week's Cartoon Network premieres. They certainly seem a lot more authentic than when they attempt to write their own new characters into the story, like the two episodes airing on YTV this week. Fillers, fillers, fillers; they make fanboys make dozens of angry, patronizing message board posts while crying. Which is scientifically speaking the worst thing ever.
Saturday June 7 9:30am - Episode 525 “Journey to the Unown”
I know what you're thinking. "Brian, you misspelled the word 'Unknown' up there." WRONG. "Unown" is a Pokémon, and since you can't legally trademark a common word like "Unknown," "Unown" it is.
Sunday June 8 1:30am - Episode 35 (Repeats Sun June 8 4:30am)
Pants-wetting hilarity! Fourth-wall breaking! Jokes about The Golden Girls! Inappropriate toddler cartoon swearing and nudity! Shin-chan! YEAH!!!
Friday June 13 11:00pm - Episode 15 “Hell is a Wet Woman” (Repeats Sat June 14 2:00am)
Saiga and Kagura are still running through the countryside, with everyone and their mother hot on their heels, and a sad, tragic woman that provides a particularly wet threat to their survival. And I mean WATER here, people. Don't even go there. (I got the title's screwed up for this week's and last week's episode - this one is the correct one! I am merely making this note to ensure you all that I learn from my mistakes. Whenever necessary.)
Street Fighter II V
-Monday June 9 11:00pm - Episode 21 "Compulsion Towards Vengeance: Cybership - The Challenge to Mind Control" (Repeats Tue June 10 11:00am, 5:00pm)
-Monday June 9 11:30pm - Episode 22 "Rising Dragon Into the Sky: The Extremes of Rage - The Awakening of Hadou" (Repeats Tue June 10 11:30am, 5:30pm)
The evil M. Bison (OR "VEGA" IF YOU PREFER THE PURE, UNMOLESTED ORIGINAL JAPANESE VERSION) is holding both Ryu and Ken hostage, with Ryu about to become a mindless slave to his every whim, until Ken uses his Shoryuken (down-forward-down-forward+punch) to free himself.
Saturday June 7 10:30am - Episode 24 “S.U.V. - Society of Ultimate Villainy” (Repeats Sun June 8 11:00am)
The Transformers Go! "Green" in this week's episode, as they beat up a gang of transforming Sport Utility Vehicles for having poor gas mileage and atrocious safety flaws, and being iconic of a wasteful, polluting lifestyle.
Friday June 13 11:30pm - Episode 24 “The Roppongi Crises” (Repeats Sat June 14 2:30am)
The final Witchblade anime episode, ever! Masane attempts to protect her "daughter" from the impending apocalypse wrought by the Witchblade itself. Lots of protruding breasts and ass cheeks abound!
Saturday June 7 11:00am - Episode 147 "Conquering the Past, Part 2"
Jaden is in a bit of a Duel Monsters bind, being unable to summon certain kinds of monsters, so his cowardly combatant uses this against him in some kind of fashion that requires lots of expository dialog and posturing.
Rounding out the lineup of noteworthy stuff is Appleseed, which isn't terribly noteworthy anymore, and Castle of Cagliostro, which is noteworthy for still being supremely excellent but I've already featured it several times before so I think you already know that. Unless you're reading this for the first time! In which I have to say - Castle of Cagliostro is way wicked great.
That ends The Click, it seems, insofar as my own little pithy comments make for entertaining light reading when you could be enlightening yourself with a novel by James Joyce or that filthy new Chuck Pahlaniuk book, so I just have to say: thanks for reading! I'll be back next time!
Bakugan Battle Brawlers
-Mon June 9 8:00am - Episode 6 “Combination Battle”
-Tue June 10 8:00am - Episode 7 “Bakugan Idol”
-Wed June 11 8:00am - Episode 8 “Girls Just Want to Have Fun”
-Thu June 12 8:00am - Episode 9 “Fight or Flight”
-Fri June 13 8:00am - Episode 10 “A Perfect Match”
-Fri June 13 9:30pm - Episode 13 (R Sat June 14 2:00am)
-Sat June 7 11:00pm - Episode 19 “Only Say Good Night to You”
-Sat June 7 11:30pm - Episode 20 “Lover's Holiday”
-Sun June 8 1:30am - Episode 176 “Darkest Before Duskmon”
-Sun June 8 6:30am - Episode 177 “Home Again, Takuya Returns” (R Mon June 9 1:30am)
-Mon June 9 6:30am - Episode 115 “Much Ado About Musyamon”
-Mon June 9 9:30pm - Episode 232 “The Truth About Keenan”
-Tue June 10 6:30am - Episode 116 “Divided They Stand”
-Wed June 11 6:30am - Episode 117 “Juggernaut”
-Thu June 12 6:30am - Episode 118 “Grow Mon Grow”
-Fri June 13 6:30am - Episode 119 “Snakes, Trains and Digimon”
-Fri June 13 9:30pm - Episode 233 “The Crier Family Reunion”
-Sat June 14 6:30am - Episode 178 “Sockit Takuya”
-Sat June 7 10:30am - Episode 8 “Maui Owie!”
-Tue June 10 6:00pm - Episode 22 “The Buried Legend” (R Tue June 10 9:00pm, Wed June 11 1:30am, 1:30pm)
-Sat June 14 2:30am - Episode 30 "Change of Life”
-Sat June 14 1:00am - Episode 14 "Destruction's Right Hand”
-Tue June 10 6:30pm - Episode 22 “Counterattack” (R Tue June 10 9:30pm, Wed June 11 2:00am, 2:00pm)
-Sun June 8 7:00am - Episode 4 “Oju Goes Blond! Whodunnit?”
-Tue June 10 10:00am - Episode 5 “Ooedoo Clan in Crisis”
Gundam Seed Destiny
-Fri June 13 10:30pm - Episode 11 "The Chosen Path"
-Sat June 7 11:00pm - Episode 9 “Terror of the Ancient Noh Mask” (R Sun June 8 2:00am)
-Sat June 7 11:30pm - Episode 10 “Soul Piper and the Mischievous Little Soul” (R Sun June 8 2:30am)
-Sun June 8 5:00am - Episode 86 “Secret of the Possessed Princess”
-Sun June 8 5:30am - Episode 87 “Kikyo's Lonely Journey”
-Mon June 9 5:00am - Episode 88 “Three Sprites of the Monkey God”
-Mon June 9 5:30am - Episode 89 “Nursing Battle of the Rival Lovers”
-Tue June 10 5:30am - Episode 90 “Sota's Brave Confession of Love”
-Wed June 11 5:30am - Episode 91 “Suspicious Faith Healer and the Black Kirara”
-Thu June 12 5:30am - Episode 92 “Plot of the Walking Dead”
-Fri June 13 5:30am - Episode 93 “Mystery of the Lecherous Monk”
-Sat June 14 5:30am - Epsiode 94 “The Sacred Jewel Maker, Part 1”
Law of Ueki
-Tue June 10 7:00pm - Episode 22 “The Law of Inumaru” (R Tue June 10 10:00pm, Wed June 11 2:30am, 2:30pm)
-Mon June 9 11:00pm - Episode 4
-Mon June 9 10:30pm - Episode 130 “Father and Son, the Broken Crest”
-Tue June 10 10:30pm - Episode 131 “The Secrets of the Mangekyo Sharingan”
-Wed June 11 10:30pm - Episode 132 “For a Friend”
-Thu June 12 10:30pm - Episode 133 “A Plea From a Friend”
-Sun June 8 2:30am - Episode 17 “Optimized Like Ondai”
-Mon June 9 2:30am - Episode 18 “Monstrous Like Muir”
-Mon June 9 7:00am - Episode 122 “Roll On, Pokémon”
-Mon June 9 7:30am - Episode 123 “Illusion Confusion”
-Tue June 10 7:00am - Episode 124 “Flower Power”
-Tue June 10 7:30am - Episode 125 “Spinarak Attack”
-Wed June 11 7:00am - Episode 126 “Snubble Snobbery”
-Wed June 11 7:30am - Episode 127 “The Little Big Horn”
-Thu June 12 7:00am - Episode 128 “The Chikorita Rescue”
-Thu June 12 7:30am - Episode 129 “Once in a Blue Moon”
-Fri June 13 7:00am - Episode 130 “The Whistle Stop”
-Fri June 13 7:30am - Episode 131 “Ignorance is Blissey”
-Mon June 9 1:00pm - Episode 46 “From the Depths of Despair”
-Tue June 10 1:00pm - Episode 47 “Desperate Diving”
-Wed June 11 1:00pm - Episode 48 “The English Channel in a Storm”
-Thu June 12 1:00pm - Episode 49 “Two Mothers”
-Fri June 13 1:00pm - Episode 50 “The First Spoken Word: Remi!”
-Tue June 10 4:00am - Episode 23 “Bear Claws”
-Wed June 11 4:00am - Episode 24 “The Nightmare Dream Center”
-Thu June 12 4:00am - Episode 25 “Eilis of the Storm”
-Fri June 13 4:00am - Episode 26 “Reviving Yakumo”
-Sat June 14 4:00am - Episode 27 “Lanancuras Arises”
-Mon June 9 8:30pm - Episode 14 “The Wedding Photographer” (R Tue June 10 12:30am)
-Tue June 10 12:00am - Episode 10 “Never Mind”
-Tue June 10 12:30am - Episode 11 “No Woman, No Cry”
-Mon June 9 6:00am - Episode 14 “Nature Calls”
-Mon June 9 6:30am - Episode 17 “The Elite Guard”
-Tue June 10 6:00am - Episode15 “Megaton Rising, Part 1”
-Tue June 10 6:30am - Episode 16 “Megaton Rising, Part 2”
-Wed June 11 6:00am - Episode 18 “The Return of the Headmaster”
-Wed June 11 6:30am - Episode 19 “Mission Accomplished”
-Thu June 12 6:00am - Episode 20 “Garbage In, Garbage Out”
-Thu June 12 6:30am - Episode 21 “Velocity”
-Fri June 13 6:00am - Episode 22 “Rise of the Constructicons”
-Fri June 13 6:30am - Episode 23 “A Fistful of Energon”
-Fri June 13 9:00pm - Episode 12 "Sherry's Rhapsody of Life"
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