Forum - View topicSarcastic/Honest anime taglines.
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Animeking1108
Posts: 1244 |
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One thing I've noticed about anime DVDs is that we don't see many taglines. This was inspired by Cracked's "Sarcastic Taglines" collection.
Don't worry. I learned my lesson from the Brutally Honest Anime Titles. This will contain less bias against franchises. Dragon Ball Z: Dragon Box Collection- We know we already released this series 20 times, but what's 20 more? It's the only franchise keeping this company afloat, considering the Otaku inability to support the official release. Pokemon: Season 1- Relive the good old days when Ash was only a noob, there weren't more Pokemon than stars in the galaxy, and 4Kids still had credibility as a dubbing company. Fist of the North Star- He can kill you just by poking you... Admit it, you think that's freaken awesome. Lucky Star- 'Family Guy' meets 'Seinfeld.' Don't worry, there's no dead baby humor and political bias. Ranma 1/2- Action, thrills, and finding out who left the toilet seat up! InuYasha- From the creator of 'Ranma 1/2' comes the exact same thing, only with more filler! Naruto: Season 6- Sure, the fillers start here, but disc one should be worth it, right? Akira- You might as well buy this. It's not like the remake has a decided cast. Fullmetal Alchemist- For the first time... Man has seen the unbelievable... An adaptation that consists mostly of filler, but still manages to still be an iconic series. FMA: Brotherhood- The fans were patient for the manga to end for this. It's a shame the animators weren't. Dragon Ball GT- From the studio that brought such neccessary sequels like 'Battle Royale II: Requim' and 'Fist of the North Star II' comes the ending fans truely wanted. Shin-chan (Funimation Dub)- What better way to honor Yoshito Usui's memory by filling his iconic franchise with jokes about domestic abuse, gay jokes, and more character derailment than a filler episode of 'Naruto.' Usui definately isn't turning in his grave. Sgt. Frog- Sure, the 'Gundam' product placement lacks subtlety, but look at it this way: it does a better job at making you want to buy robot model kits than 'Gundam SEED: Destiny'. Love Hina- Americans like Domestic Abuse humor, right? Negima! OVAs- Fourth time is the charm, right? One Piece (4Kids dub)- Toei Animation didn't care when they sold the rights, so why should you? Shaman King (uncut 4Kids dub)- Did you enjoy seeing 'Shaman King' in it's uncut glory? Too bad! High School of the Dead- When the boobs aren't distracting the audience, the annoying characters sure as hell will. Samurai Champloo- What Spike Spiegel did before 'Cowboy Bebop'. Desert Punk- Still think Subs always beat Dubs? Hetalia- It's not racist. Everyone is equally an offensive stereotype. Fruits Basket- Romance, comedy, and perfect for drinking games. Vampire Knight- If you despise 'Twilight,' you will enjoy this. End of Evangelion- If you thought 'Mass Effect 3' was a middle finger for the viewer, you haven't seen anything yet. Gurren Laggann Movie 1- If you loved the series, you'll love this 90 minute clip-show. Dragon Ball Z: Bio-Brolly- Watch and be amazed as one of the most badass movie villains gets reduced to a brain-damaged blob that gets killed by water. The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya- The episode order is screwed up. The perfect marketing strategy! |
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EireformContinent
 Posts: 977 Location: Łódź/Poland (The Promised Land) |
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Thumbs up for Hetalia!
Sprited Away-won an Oscar, so you will just check it no matter what. Maria Sama Ga Miteru- Provides you the most unrealistic portray of Catholic Girls High Schools since previous series. High-school lesbianism as an alternative way of peace and love for our children. Rose of the Versailles- Description of deadly decadent court turns you into god old-tile royalist in less than 3 episodes. Only Yesterday- True tale of single just about to turn 30 without idea for her life. Don't cry over her, unlike you, she at least has friends. Mononoke- the closest thing to real absinthe you can obtain legally. Legend of the Galactic Heroes- by history nerds, about history nerds, for history nerds. Utena Epic tale about adolescence , breaking old habits and finding true self and re-define your life... WE HAVE LESBIANS Yokoyama Mitsuteru Sangokushi- 47 episodes of messing with China's total classic. Watch and pose as you had read it all we don't take responsibility for speaking about this anime to actual ROTK fans Victorian Romance Emma- beautiful story where brave maid wins a heart of good for nothing merchant heir, causing no social scandal in XIX century London. Plus Hindu prince advocating for the freedom of heart and equality of all people. Last edited by EireformContinent on Fri Jun 08, 2012 11:58 am; edited 1 time in total |
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SereneChaos
 Posts: 384 Location: Middle of Nowhere, USA |
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One Piece- the unending journey of some pirates trying to circumnavigate the world.
Black Butler- hot guys teasing yoai fangirls Hetalia- See above Death Note- A board teenager tries to take over the world with a magical school supply Durarara!- We don't actually know what this is about, but it's fun to watch Hellsing- Vampire hunting vampires + vampire Nazis + secret Vatican vampire hunters = lots and lots of blood, guts and gore |
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notazaku
 Posts: 135 |
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Gundam- War is hell, robots are cool, buy this model kit.
That's pretty accurate actually. 
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dragoneyes001
 Posts: 873 |
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FMA- The moral of the story is "Don't try to revive your dead Mother" here's a box set of why!
Dragon Ball Z- this box set contains 25% more sayan Power ups than the previous set did get it now while its hot! One Piece- this box set has 36 of the latest episodes with 4 minutes each of intro for a whopping total of 144 minutes we didn't have to animate for you. Nazo_no_Kanojo_X- you know we've run out of idea's when? the premiss of the show is a girl sticking her saliva covered finger into the MC's mouth every day! High School of the Dead- Yes Boobs can be used as a bi-pod for an automatic weapon. Saki Episode of Side A -For all you young boys who didn't get enough Big Boob references in the first series. Death Note- its true if your in a bind an apple will get your death god to bail you out ! |
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EricJ
 Posts: 876 |
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Well, I remember one of the danger signs of studio overlicensing of current TV series sight-unseen, that lead to the US Anime Recession, was best symbolized by Funimation's real tagline for Shuffle!, although I don't know whether they were trying to be sarcastic:
"Wanna see 30 panty shots in twenty minutes?" |
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EricJ
Posts: 876 |
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Er...the heck?? 
Was thinking more along the lines of: Lucky Star - Yes, they're talking about snacks. Japanese girls don't have complex lives. A few other fixes: Akira - Remember when you thought you were cool because you'd heard of it? Ranma 1/2 - Yes, they can't stay out of the bathtubs, but it's probably the only show your friends will understand at first! Sgt. Frog - So, is this where those dub writers went when they were kicked off of Lupin III? Howl's Moving Castle - Admit it, it's this and Spirited Away and you've never even SEEN any of the others, have you? Negima! OVAs - The franchise that can't take a hint. |
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Redbeard 101
Oscar the Grouch
Forums Superstar  Posts: 16983 |
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Not trying to sound like a buzz kill here but is there a point to this thread? I mean that as in is there supposed to be some sort of discussion or consensus on any of the taglines or are we just supposed to list random ones off?
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DuskyPredator
 Posts: 15920 Location: Brisbane, Australia |
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Shangri-La - If you would love to see a girl in a short skirt destroy tanks with a giant boomerang, you will love the first episode, and added bonus of the rest of series filled with confusing enviromental politics talk. And trannies.
Hanamaru Kindergarten - A show about kindergarteners for otaku, somehow it is still the most adorable thing you will see. Mitsudomoe - A hillarious comedy with elementry students filled with blood, pee and snot, and pedophilia jokes. B Gata H Kei - She ain't a slut if she is a virgin. Chobits - You will never look at your PC the same way again. Asobi ni Iku yo - Best aliens ever. The World God Only Knows - Solving girls' problems with the logic of gal games. Saki - Come for the Mahjong, stay boobs and penguin and loli's tacos. FLCL - I still don't get it! |
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Key
Moderator
 Posts: 19175 Location: Indianapolis, IN (formerly Mimiho Valley) |
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Can't resist adding this one:
Dance in the Vampire Bund - It's not really lolicon because she's, y'know, actually hundreds of years old. In fact, it's the reverse: a cradle-robbing female vampire. |
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DuskyPredator
Posts: 15920 Location: Brisbane, Australia |
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Astarotte's Toy - Don't worry, it is not illegal in their culture. |
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Animegomaniac
Posts: 4287 |
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The Disappearance of Haruhi Suzumiya: How many times must we say we're sorry for Endless Eight?
Heaven's Lost Property: Forte: Now with 50% more boobs but still no nudity. Neon Genesis Evangelion: Rebirth of Evangelion: You Are [not] Alone. New subtitles, same old emotional crapfest. Bodacious Space Pirates: Did we mention what they were, where they were and how they were? |
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ikillchicken
 Posts: 7272 Location: Vancouver |
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Dusk Maiden of Amnesia - A totally serious horror anime that...bwa ha ha no but seriously its an ecchi show.
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Mesonoxian Eve
Posts: 1858 |
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Lucky Star - For the male otaku, who feels alone.
Neon Genesis Evangelion - Watch it once. Bitch about it forever. The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya - Sorry, yuri fans. It's just good, old-fashioned sexual harassment. Sister Princess - Trust us, you won't be alone with the questions. Girl's High - This isn't what I meant by "Let's have crabs for lunch". Azumanga Daioh - DVD Player. Bluray Player. I.. I can never remember which one is which. Death Note - Perpetuating the belief any series without moe is a masterpiece when it's really not. Suzuka - (formerly titled How To Stalk Suzuka) Koihime Musou - A buffet of girls to please everyone. Squid Girl - We said tentacles. Magic Knight Rayearth - We exchanged "Mecha" for "Magic Knight" to boost sales. Sailor Moon - You can just keep dreaming. Aria - The most expensive sleeping aid you'll buy. Green Green - NO REFUNDS! Polyphonica - Note: Organ, the instrument. This isn't hentai. Shakugan No Shana - Yes, we really mean brother and sister (and going where other series only tease). Bamboo Blade - Are you sure you're not looking for Kill Bill? Dragon Ball - It's over 9000! ... dollars to own the entire franchise on DVD. Own it today. Strike Witches - No! You keep your pants on! Astarotte no Omocha - Eat your heart out, Kodomo no Jikan. Voltron - We're sorry, Lotor, but the princess is in another lion. Mitsudomoe - Blurrying the line between "fan of loli" and "fan of lolicon". You're welcome. Air - You'll wish there were less of it in her head. Kanon - How to steal and influence people. Clannad - Drama... clubbing you to tears. Kaze no Stigma - This is the series you're thinking of. Honest! Maidens are Falling For Me - It's okay. You won't be the only one. Gosick - Titled to rise atop alphabetical anime listings. |
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EireformContinent
Posts: 977 Location: Łódź/Poland (The Promised Land) |
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That's not pedo, there are cultural diffrences. Hyouge Mono Incredibly humor based on historical jokes and cultural references you will never get. Oruchuban Ebichu Hamtaro goes wild Bartender When drinking is just not enough. Black Jack OVA House-drugs+ WTF? Berserk Series considered a masterpiece by 90% of reviewers. The rest had read the manga. Death Note Japanese attempt to milk the concept that Russians had already squeezed, demolished and eaten raw more than 100 years ago. Glass Mask 30 years of best selling manga, 3 TV series, 2 anime, OVA and still hadn't find the chosen one. Hana yori Dango Marvelous heroine bearing bullying, rape attempts and other horrible things to fall in love in the biggest prick ever. Rich prick. |
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